I am not poor today but have been in my life many times.

Poor in mind, poor in body, poor in spirit and lastly but not least poor in finances.

The mind is a powerful tool in our life; it can be used for good or bad and everything in between.

When my mind is distressed, it affects every area of my life. Psychosis, depression and anxiety plague me at times but not now. I do much to take care of my mind by way of ~ a medicine cocktail (that took a while to find), supplements and challenging creative efforts; these include writing and exercise, mainly walking and yoga.

The mind is also a terrible thing to waste with drugs and alcohol in abusive form; using substances to escape is not my way anymore and I feel free.

Spirit must also be acknowledged, whatever our faith or lack thereof. Neglecting this aspect of ourselves does us a disservice.

Poor in spirit I am not. Rituals surround me and I try to do good in all I do- for me, my family and friends and the world. Since I was a child, I have always helped others except when I was using drugs and alcohol. I’m coming up on 10 months of recovery and have now a new focus for my days. I’m sometimes religious but not tonight. All religions interest me until they don’t make sense, so I claim no particular faith.

Poor in finances is actually what I wish to focus on; for many in this world are fighting to survive and support their families. I can only share my experience with this. My adult daughter calls it luck but I prefer to call it something else entirely; some would say faith, others fate and me well I’m not really sure why but I have been poor and happier than when I’ve had much.

Being poor requires a certain discipline, a constant decision of what is most necessary for one to be ok. I don’t need much to be happy except love and I am blessed with that as well. My parents scrimped and saved and we often went without. Yet, we were happy for Saturday nights when we got to eat a frozen pizza sometimes.

But having a house and car is a certain security that many do not have. I’ve walked my share of miles in dirty sneakers with holes being without a home or car and still been happy. Wanting more at those times in my life always created discontentment so I made due and pretended I had more when I was cold and hungry. In the end I always got exactly what I needed and that hasn’t stopped happening yet.

For I believe our happiness does not rest in our material possessions; although, I do take comfort in my cozy bed but I have been just as content sleeping on a bench or the floor. Just can’t stand the cold.

For me it is love that binds my existence and I just recently found that out.

So, if you are loved by anyone feel grateful even if it is a fur friend. For love is truly all that matters in the end.

Text © Victoria Marie Alonso

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