Written by George Gad Economou

lost in the algid abyss, traipsing drunk in the empty streets,

trying to remember where home is, searching for familiar places.

infuriated with the world, with the gods, everything and everyone around me.

drunk in the rain, slumbering through the streets, ignoring traffic, oncoming trains.

suicidal desires never come true, nothing runs me over.

back home, tucked in, somehow someway. waking up, no recollection

of how I made it back. they ask, I lie my ass off, it’s all right.

hungover, nauseous, trying to recall the lost night.

nothing; it doesn’t matter.

lost friends, lost kisses, lost liver, lost mind.

lost.

story of a bourbon bottle dried long long ago, it still remains alive

somewhere in the gutter; when it all came crumbling down

and the bombs were fired,

the bottle was all that remained. still does. will forever do.

someone kissed me in my drunkenness. a new number in my phone,

texts, calls—different people, new people I don’t recall

and never will see. it’s all right; drunk mornings, lost nights,

burning down the few remaining bridges, refusing to erect new ones.

simply going through the daily motions of nothingness—determined

not to let the charade go on for much fucking longer.

staring at the yellowish wall, breathing in the deadly nicotine.

it keeps me alive; breathing it in, feeling younger every second.

I won’t have flashbacks on my deathbed; unless the blackout veil

gets lifted the moments before death. experience tells me

there are no flashbacks. only hallucinations of the Bar.

it’s all right; a toast to the sky, 8am and the first bourbon’s downed.

time for round two—today’s gonna be a long fight.

Text © George Gad Economou

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