Written by Giselle Beaufort @ Becoming a Widow After Suicide


Life lays hidden, unpredictable

Wrapped in layers of routines

Blinds to open

Dogs to feed

Clocks to set

Meals to eat

They keep us safe

We think

Then one day, maybe

a doorbell rings


Are you his wife?

   This isn’t real

Please have a seat

   I can’t

He was found

   No he wasn’t

Just down the road

   Its all wrong

We need to know

   No, don’t say it

Where should we send the body


Rehearsed routines now stand in silence


Life lays hidden unpredictable

wrapped in layers of routines

Just below the surface

chaos seeps unseen


And the truck?


I’ll pick it up

   Did he shoot himself in the head

You probably shouldn’t

   What was he thinking

Oh yes, of course


Moments never known before

Now gather for this scene

Red bench

Front porch

Dogs barking

Garden, not yet spring

I’ve known these things before

I know them now

I’ve never seen these things before


Life lays hidden unpredictable

routines offer up their solace

days move one inside the other

exactly as we planned

then one day


a doorbell rings


Text © Giselle Beaufort




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