Written by Life Coach Carioca Da Gema


The most important lesson one can learn from battling is to avoid it at any cost. Battles are intellectually and physically exhausting, and can many times cost you a lot of money.  Nevertheless, they are inevitable, as we all have boundaries of tolerance that if crossed we must defend.

In our early years we scuffle over our toys, then about depictions of our mothers, critics of a favorite sports team can quickly evolve into a brawl. Confrontations, whether physically or verbally is a necessary part of growing older.

As we mature our exchanges are composed of less and less violence and become more strategic in nature.

The most important item of necessity in a battle is time. Patience will pay in personal disturbances, while altercations with strangers, using time to research your opponent will prove beneficial.

Family clashes disturbs everyone in the circle. Most of the time, it takes more effort to carry negative feelings towards a love one than to reach out and try to understand the events leading to the disturbance so changes in behavior can be made.  Sadly for many, family gatherings make them feel worse, each time they attend. These individuals have the right to try spending their time in a way that makes them happy, even if outside of the predetermined ideal settings of togetherness. If the guilt of not being present is more destructive for your self preservation than absence, keep your attendance, find a way to keep busy, less interaction yields less chance of trouble.

Otherwise, safeguard self and go somewhere else.

Furthermore, when entering battle you must know your position, if you cannot go for the kill; always leave your opponent an opening. Don’t underestimate your contender!

Usually we do not get caught in our first infraction. That also goes for your rival. The bigger the opponent’s organization, the larger is the margin of error and more lazy people will leave crumbs everywhere for you to find. Yes, they have more money to fight but also have public opinion to contend with.

Avoid! Avoid! Avoid!

But if you must tussle, make sure you are fighting for what is yours and there is no such a thing as “You cannot fight City Hall”.



This article is part of the Rewind Series 



“I will not make you dependent on me.  My approach is to find alternative options under a circumstance and open new doors into a resolution of old problems. Clear the docket so you can see things from other angles as you absorb other possibilities. In time, after you had conquered your needs, you will be able to replace what does not work, accept what you cannot change, and accomplish what you want.”

Life Coach Carioca Da Gema


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